More updates on the house

This is the mud dobber nest that just appeared one day out of nowhere. I think it's really freaky looking, like a mummy's head or something. The bees were HUGE. Thank God Jake got rid of them!
I thought this cobweb looked neat covered in dust.

I have always wanted a room painted red. Well, after this sample I decided against it because every red I find seems to look like some shade of trashy magenta lipstick that only a transvestite would wear! I don't know if I need to go ahead and use the tinted primer first or what I should do, but I think I have changed my mind to Kelly Green for that room.

This will be the color of my office.

More updates to come at a later date!

Random Quotations

As we have already established, I am a sucker for quotations. There is a quote to go along with anything you are experiencing, and I know at least 1 for almost anything. Here are just a couple that have stuck out in my mind lately.



"There is no honor among thieves."

These words were said to me by my boss a week or so ago when another coworker was trying to get in on one of my deals. I have not been able to get them out of my head since. I have been so miserable in this job for most of my employment here, and maybe this is why. I am not a thief, I do not practice dirty business. That being said, how can I in good conscience keep working here? If I am to make a decent living, which it is hard for me to do while other sales people are honing in on my deals, am I going to have to start doing my job the same way that everyone else in the office does? I WILL NOT compromise my beliefs, ethics, and morals and stoop to an all time low of thieving deals out from underneath other sales people.

"Good things happen to those who wait."
Wouldn't you just love to slap the person who said that!?!? I started thinking about this quote while I was busy working on our house. I was looking around and thinking of how we had been looking for a house for SO long and just were not having any luck. Then along came the most wonderful realtor in the workd, Karen, and Max and Bonnie and BAM! we've got a house, and it only took us 2 years of searching! Well, then last night Jake popped the question, well sort of. He asked me if I wanted to get married and then said it was "an option". Are you kidding me? Well, if that didn't make me feel like I really mean that much to him! We have been together for quite some time now and I can't help but wonder when we will actually take the plunge. I look at it like this: we have been together for a long time, we have been living together for a long time, we just bought a house together, we have joint bank accounts, we have a dog together, we are already basically married, so why is he so afraid to actually do it? I have waited, long enough I think, so why aren't good things happening?

Well folks, I suppose I have bored you all with my random bitchings enough for today. Until tomorrow...

Have you ever seen rocks pray?

Mama's, PLEASE let your babys grow up to be cowboys!

Why, why why? (part 2)

What ever happened to an E grade? We have A,B,C,D,F but no E.

Don't you find it worrying that doctors call treating you their "practice" ?

If croutons are stale bread, why do they come in airtight packages?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

If a transport truck carrying a load of cars gets into a car accident, does it increase the number of the cars in the pile-up?

Why does mineral water that has "trickled through mountains for centuries" go out of date next year?

Why are SOFTballs hard?

Do vampires get AIDS?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?

Why are they called goose bumps? Do geese get people bumps?

Why is it that lemon dishsoap is made with real lemons, but lemon juice is artificial flavoring?

If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?

Does a postman deliver his own mail?

Why dosent a chicken egg taste like chicken?

Why is it that cargo is transported by ship while a shipment is transported by car?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up "there" anyway?

Why do birds have white poop?

If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?


Did they have antiques in the olden days?

Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with black stripes?

Is a sleeping bag a nap sack?

Can blind people see their dreams?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

If we all evolved from monkeys, how come there's still monkeys around now? Why do they call it taking a dump?

Shouldn't it be leaving a dump?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

Is Disney world the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep 3 or 4 open?

If you get cheated by the better business bereau, who do you complain to?

If you're in hell, and are mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

Why are turds pinched off at the end?

Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?

Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your ass?

Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

Did Adam and Eve have navels?

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window!

If a cat always lands on its feet, and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?

If women ran the Pentagon, would missiles and submarines be shaped differently?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why don't you ever see baby pigions?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

Well, I am getting ready to go shopping with Lana. I think we are going to get paint and hopefully we will get a lot of work done on the house, unlike last weekend!

Cute Overload

This really does look like a cat.

Now this is what I call sunbathing!

What a thoughful pose!

Isin't this just the sweetest thing?

WOW!!

Hooray!!

This is funny to me because Peanut does it. He is fine with horses until they put their big faces next to his little body.

This looks like an Easter picture.

This is funny to me because I have actually seen foals do this!

"Hey you, keep it down over there!"

This is the backgroung to my computer screen at work!

Look at the big ones make fun of the little on that fell over!

I hope I never see that when I look in a mirror!

This is the picture on my Yahoo Messenger, and the caption says "What a world! What a world!! *scraming in agony*

I think this would be the neatest thing to see.

How can you look at this face and not laugh?

This looks like Sam's puppy.

I normally think that albino things are scary, but this is beautiful. It looks like a snowflake.

All by myself

I have had the strangest emotions lately. I have felt so bummed out and so...well, alone, for lack of a better word. The past couple of weeks have been so crappy with everything that has been going on. Between my job, which I still don't like, the new house that no one will even talk to me about, and all of Jake's overtime, I have been on overload.

My birthday is tomorrow. Maybe I am being selfish, but aren't people supposed to recognize that? Shouldn't people say, "Oh, happy birthday, Kianne"? Shouldn't people at least act as if they care? What happened to the childhood birthdays where you got birthday cards the whole week before your birthday? I don't expect people to buy me a present or send me any money, I just want people to act like they even care the I was born 24 years ago on this day. Is that really to much to ask?

Most of my friends are so wrapped up with their own lives that they don't even give a damn about what is going on with me. I have said this before, but why is it that when one of them needs something I am the first person they call, but if I need something they blow me off or make up lame excuses to get out of it? Only one of my friends has the right to do something like that right now and she's not even the one doing it!

Of all the people that should act like they give a damn about my birthday, you would think that Jake would. Nope. He acts even more clueless than usual. He comes and goes as he pleases, leaving messes behind him all along the way. I really don't think he realizes everything that I do around the house. Carma and I were talking about this this morning, she says that Ayron is the same way but she can strike a deal with him and trade off chores. That must be nice. I make a list of just a handful of things that need done around the house and I divide them up between Jake and I both, I the list always favors Jake. Well, it has taken Jake 5 days to do 5 simple things that were on his list and he is still not done with it! I am at my wits-end with him on this. I keep telling him that there is no way I can work as many hours as I do now and keep a house that size clean all by myself. I really just feel like he doesn't appreciate me, and like he barely likes me. Every night when I go to bed I go by myself. Jake stays up half the night watching tv and then just falls asleep on the couch. I told him before that if I have to do everything by myself and then go to bed by myself then I might as well live by myself. I said that thinking that he would get the hint and start paying a little more attention to me, but he took it the opposite way and got really defensive about everything. Since that backfired I just don't say anything at all. He doesn't get it if I tell him exactly what is wrong, and he doesn't get it if I try to be subtle. Talk about frustrating!

I sold a house yesterday to a really great family. I should be excited for the commission...but I'm not. One of the ass holes that I work with is trying to split the commission because the customers stopped in once when I was not here and he talked with them. He never told me that they were here and the customers told me that they did ask for me and that while the other salesman was talking with them he was just more interested in talking about his Harley. I am not opposed to splitting commissions, if and only if the salesman that wants to split does his share of work and follow up and lets me know that they were even here. Am I wrong in this?

My boss pulled me aside and talked to me about it for a little bit this morning. He asked me to offer $200 to the other salesman. Why should I? If I have to share every freaking deal with someone else then what am I even here for? My boss even told me that there is no honor among thieves and since this is my first sales job I still have to figure that out. "For what it's worth, I do agree with you on this on, Kianne," is what he told me. He said that the other sales person is grouchy and he was just trying to keep the peace. I understand what he is trying to do, but what I don't understand is if he agrees with me them why in the hell is he trying so hard to keep the other guy happy? What about me? What about how I feel, and what about my bank account, and what about how I feel, and what about what I think?

I checked my email this morning and I had a letter from my grandma. Grandpa Shoaf is having surgery on his foot tomorrow. It really is no big deal, it's an in and out surgery. Nevertheless, I closed my eyes to murmur a quick prayer. While I am sitting at my desk praying, I started bawling. It was the strangest crying that I have ever done. I couldn't stop crying, but I made no noise. Big, silent tears poured from my eyes all over my keyboard and planner. And the strangest thing was that I didn't even feel better, (I didn't feel worse, but after a dry like that you would think that something would feel different).

Another really strange thing happened to me today. Remember the harassment complaint that I filed at the beginning of the summer? Well, I was so bitter and hurt over the whole situation for the longest time. About what happened to cause me to file the complaint, how the complaint was handled, and the decision that was made. Well, today while I was outside talking to my boss I realized that I wish it had all never happened. I really like him and I truly feel bad about what had happened. The truth of the matter is that while I did have a problem with him, my friend that worked here had an even bigger problem with him. I was played like a game piece by my friend, who no longer works here, to get after my boss. Yes, there were problems that needed addressing, but Jeff used those problems and my sensitivity to his advantage to get me to go after our boss. I let other dictate my feelings on the entire matter. Jeff, LeAnn, and Jake really made the decision to write that letter and send it in, sure I actually pressed the "send" button, but I was convinced by them that it was the best thing to do.

How appropriate! I am feeling bummed out because I am having a bad time right now. as I am blogging about it I am listening to music on the Ares on my laptop and what song should come on but Tom Petty's "You Don't Know How it Feels to be Me"?

My parents are taking me out for dinner tonight to celebrate my birthday. They are taking me to Logan's! I can't wait to gorge myself on their wonderful homemade rolls! (And I promise to eat one for you, Carma!) I am going to go check out cuteoverload.com to cheer myself up.

Convivial Etymology

onomatopoeia

flatulence

blubber

Wapakoneta

exacerbate

Ashtubulah

Orihula

chortled

Wachovia

heinous

chaos

anus

cajole

Silly Loon

Beluga

fungal/fungal/fungi (fungus amungus)

mastication

Saskatoon (Is this a real word?)

Ignoramus/Maroon (Like Buggs Bunny: "What a maroon! What an ignoramus!")

Crud

Scud

fourschette (French for fork)

Salubrious

Wangdoodle/Vermiscious Knid (see Will Wonka)

glop

blob

supercilious

sphincter

ambidextrous

discombobulated

quadrilateral

phlebotomy/phlebotomist

poop

sharted (I only wish Jake didn't tell me what this meant!)

Emmerson (not weird, really, but I love it and I will someday name one of my kids)

Shuttlecock (the official name for the badminton birdie)

Bunghole (A hole for filling a cask or container. I can't stop giggling to myself, I can't help but think of Bevis and Butthead pulling their shirts over their heads and yelling, "More TP for my bungholio!")

Billabong (Not only a popular clothing brand, but the official term Australians call a watering hole.)

Slubbergulleon- a dirty, wretched slob (See previous post "Bitches, bitches, bitches!")

Fnord (a typographic representation of irrelevant information intending to misdirect with the implication of conspiracy)

Locofocos (A radical group of Democrats existing from 1835 to the mid 1840s)

Titicaca (this just sounds like the name to a dirty strip joint to me)

Pupkus (the moist residue left on a window after a dog presses his nose to it. I have actually called Peanut this a few times and thought I was making up a word.)

Telecrastination (the act of letting the phone ring at least twice before picking up, even if you are only inches away. I do this, I was always told by my mom that it was rude to pick up before the second ring.)

Callipygian (a finely developed buttocks)

Ecdysiast (a striptease artist. Who knew there was an official job title for that?!?)

Frust (The small line of debris that refuses to be swept up into a dust pan and keeps backing a person across a room until finally he decides to give up and just sweep it under a rug.)

Disconfect (to sterilize a piece of food by blowing on it, after it has been dropped on the floor, and eating it...assuming that will remove all of the germs. All persons that have do this say "I"...)

Tintinnabulation (the sound of ringing bells)

Orogeny (I actually remember this one from Mr. Blackburn's Oceanography class Senior year in high school! It has something to do with the movement of Earth's tectonic plates-or crustal plates- moving below one another. "Subduction leads to orogeny..." Sounds sort of dirty, you know, like "Did the earth move for you, baby?")

Boanthropy (the condition of believing oneself to be an OX! Can you imagine? Someone had to actually believe that they were an ox for someone else to name the condition. Check this out: http://blogcritics.org/archives/2006/01/10/052819.php)

Etymology (the study of words, their origin and meaning)

pneumonoultramicospicsilicovolcanocniosis (the scientific term for Black Lung Disease)

And last, but certainly not least...

Obfuscation (The unnecessary employ of cumbersome verbiage!)

Blah, blah, blah...me and my ramblings

Oh thank Heavens that my workday is almost over!! I am truly surprised that I made it all day, I have cramps sooooo bad. Being a girl SUCKS!! I have a TON of things that I need to get done at the house tonight, but I think that I am just going to take it easy and chill on the couch with a good book and my wiener. You know, the wiener dog! ;)

Well this weekend did not go at all as planned. Since Jake was in Michigan the whole time I spent most of the time by myself...not getting any work done on the house. Friday Carma and I went down to Fort Wayne to pick up one of my kayaks and their new entertainment center. I found a couple that I liked, and Jake agreed, but they were both really expensive so I think we are going to check out Cherished Again. I wonder if they have layaway?

Friday night I went to Goodwill and out to eat with Dale and Lana. Lana found a lamp that will match the house perfectly. Dale took me on Sunday up to Coldwater to pick up the deep freeze. We took Peanut, it was really funny when he met Carma's dad's daschund, I wish I would have had my camera.

It has been decided that Jake and I will have Christmas at our house with my mom, brother, sister, and grandparents. Since my dad is such a whack job and has decided that he doesn't like Jake or my grandpa anymore, (for reasons that we may never be aware of), I think that this is a good solution to the problem it presents at the holidays. Now the majority of the family can spend the holiday together without the family Scrooge there to ruin it for everyone else. I am really excited about doing it, it gives me the chance to show off the new house and start a family tradition. Let's just pray that the weather doesn't get too bad that Grandma and Grandpa can't make it up.

I have another interview on Wednesday. I don't really know what to expect, it's with another insurance company. This time at least I have actually heard of the company, I used to keep my insurance with them until we moved to Auburn.

Since I seem to know a ton of people who are pregnant and trying to get pregnant I have been thinking about that a lot lately. Not that Jake and I should have kids, NO WAY!! It is always fun to think of baby names and what you would actually name your own kids. With a name like Kianne I am cautious as to the names that I pick out to make sure people aren't going to say the name weird or anything annoying like that. (Which actually makes me think, down home it was a rare occasion that my name was botched by a teacher or even a substitute. Here no one seems to be able to say it right! And people say that Southerners are slow, jeez!) I have come to the conclusion that I like names that are different, but not whack-o different. Who knows what Jake would think of them though. I had probably not bring them up to him, he might interpret that way wrong!

Although I have felt like shit all day long, I have gotten a lot accomplished. I have a couple of really stupid customers that I had to deal with this morning that took up a lot of time, but thankfully they are happy now. Typical Monday I suppose.

Well, the day is coming to an end, not quickly enough, so I must wrap it up and scurry my feelin' bad self outta here. There is a comfy couch and a RoseAnn marathon on Nick at Nite calling my name. Pathetic, I know!

Blast from the past

Since Jake is putting in some serious overtime lately, I have spent more hours at home by myself than what I am used to. I liked it at first, but about an hour after Jake left this afternoon I was terribly bored and sick of being alone. I decided to organize the books that I have stashed by the computer in the back bedroom. While doing so I came across my journal from my Junior year in high school. I wrote in this journal while I spent time in Europe, when Jerry Coler died, when I saw my first Creed concert...basically this little blue book is the autobiography of my 16 year old self.

I was not the only one to write in this book. In turn I asked many of my friend to write something in it for me. Below is what Meranda and Beckie wrote. I changed the names of some of the characters in the story, (Carma, if you want to know who they really are just ask, I am too embarrassed to share with the whole world some of the more personal details).

From Meranda:

As I write this I am thinking in an English accent. I don't have much to say so I shall write a story.

Kianne was a farm girl who like many girls her age had fantasized about boys but never did anything. One such fantasy was of her and a far off man. She dreamed that one day she and this far off man would be together in a bond that needed no assistance from the outside world, a bond that could not be disturbed even by humanity and its corrupt society. She dreamed that he would lift her off her tired feet and carry her safely to a pure, untouched place where only the greatest of God's creatures thrived.
Kianne was forced to attend a class which would teach her the skills of doing even harder work than her strong yet feminine body could handle. It was one fateful day that in this tedious class that Kianne converted all her unspent energy into a daydream of the man. In this certain dream Kianne and this man were walking down a worn horse trail which had been laden with wild flowers and he was picking them to make a bouquet for her. Kianne watched intently as he delicately plucked the silky flowers, with each snap of a stem he would compare the beauty of the flower to Kianne and her spirit, beautifully vibrant yet delicate on the outside. On the inside her spirit and independence. As the man had finished plucking and started to give them to her their gaze met. A stunned translucent silence fell suddenly and all the birds, bugs and creatures in the forest seemed to stand still. Time itself rested as the gaze deepened. Suddenly, an odd untold darkness covered everything and for an instant Kianne felt as though she had just touched a soul.
"Pizza Hut sounds good right now," thundered a voice from within the darkness. Upon opening her eyes, Kianne felt needles jolt from the top of her head to the tips of her fingers and toes. She realized that she had been starring into the eyes of ****, the boy who sat across from her. Never before had Kianne felt such an uncontrolled desire to look away. That doesn't mean she did.
*10 years later...*
As Kianne and her beloved **** sat in their Victorian bedroom looking at their wedding pictures, a throbbing surged through her. ****'s gaze met hers just like on that fateful day 10 years ago in Animal Science, their engagement day. **** reached for Kianne in sweet embrace. His strong arms engulfed her in sensuous love. Kianne stiffened and she knew. Setting the picture album aside, she welcomed his manliness to capture her fantasy. Kianne surrendered her clothes to the floor as **** had done. All her life she had dreamed of a love so would hold her so deep, leaving her senses helpless to the moment. As **** entered her and they became one, her heart flooded with uncontainable emotion.
As the sun began to beam gently into the flowing curtains of their bedroom window, Kianne was caught in **** eyes, but differently now. She was at peace in the tranquil darkness of his smooth black eyes. And they lived happily ever after.

Okay, we were 16 when that was written! Seriously! What kind of 16 year-old girl writes like that! So there is some truth behind that story: Meranda and I both took Animal Science with Mr. Gurnter, (I took it knowing it was a blow-off class, Meranda actually expected to learn something.) I enjoyed the class because there was a boy...that sat in front of me...with black eyes...that I had a crush on...

I was so embarrassed when Meranda finished and had me read it. She wrote it while we were at a slumber party with Andrea and Darcie for Darcie's birthday. After I read it Meranda read it out loud to the other girls. Oh, the shame! The horror!

Well, upon reading it for herself, Beckie decided that she could not be outdone. Here is what she came up with late one night while sitting on the roof of my parents house drinking cherry juice and lighting matches in our mouths:

The air was hot and humid, but Kianne left her window down as she leaned back in the seat of a little red S-10 speeding down 35. She batted at the Pikachu hanging from the rear-view mirror. **** looked over at her from behind a pair of dark sunglasses and smiled. Kianne grinned back and gazed out the window. They soon arrived at Sundance and dived into crappy stalls, (Tom had worked the day before).

"Do you want to go to the coffeehouse after we're done?" asked ****.
"Sure, I could go for an Auburn Ice today," replied Kianne.
**** growled and dropped his fork saying, "I could go for you right now."
Kianne giggled and darted away from him. He chased her around the stall, finally grasping her shoulders he pushed her into a corner. He pressed his greedy lips to hers and smoothed hos hands over her curvaceous body. His lips moved from her lips to her neck as his fingertips became more daring.
"****," she whispered, "not here, what if someone..."
"Shhh...", he said with closed eyes putting his finger to her lips.
**** wrapped his strong arms around her body and kicked her feet out from underneath her, gently laying her down in the soft, clean shavings. He moved over her, his mouth exploring further. Her eyes were closed and her head was drawn back when she felt **** jump off of her, as if he had been yanked away.
"******!" shrieked Kianne.
Kianne jumped to her feet just in time to see ****** ********* toss **** onto the hard floor. ****'s body bounced off the cement. ****** turned and looked at Kianne with fire in his eyes.
"What the fuck are you doing?" ****** asked.
"******, what are you doing here? You're not supposed to come here!" cried Kianne.
"I just wanted to see you! That's all! I came here to bring you some flowers and this is how you fucking repay me?"
"I don't want your fucking flowers!"
**** had since climbed to his feet and brushed himself off. "Why don't you just get the hell out of here, man?"
"Shut the fuck up!" yelled ******.

Okay, okay. I am not going to keep this one up...this is just way to Beckie for me to even finish reading, let alone publish it on the Web. I forgot just how crazy she actually was! (Carma, if you want to know the rest of this...I will let you read the journal...I wrote in there about you and a certain someone from your past!)

Rereading my old journal really made me miss high school and the simplicity of my life. I had no worries. I worked at a job that I absolutely loved, I had a ton of wonderful friends, a different crush every week, I was on top of the world! Wow, things have sure changed!

Well, I better be getting to bed. Tomorrow I have to get up and go and work on the house we just bought that is costing us the price of a small country to fix up and go to a job that I can't stand, only to return home to a house that needsd cleaning and dinner that needs fixing. *humph*

Randy reads

So I decided to join an online book club to help me expand my literary horizons. Anytime I hit Borders or borders.com I find myself gravitating towards the same genre; I have the best of intentions of reading something I am not accustomed to but somehow I always end up with the same old thing. The book club thing is not a new endeavor for me, in fact, I have attempted many times to start one up with my friends and coworkers. (PS: One of my biggest pet peeves is when people say that they are too busy to read...no one is too busy to read! Here's a thought, PUT DOWN THE REMOTE!!)

Anyhow, one of the books on the list was a romance novel by an author I have never heard of. I Googled the book online and came across an excerpt on the authors website. After reading one of the most steamy sex scenes I could have ever imagined I was beginning to rethink my selection. I finally talked myself into it again when I found the book on borders.com used for $.58. Even though what I had read was raunchy, it was well written and wasn't that the whole point of me joining this book club, to read different things?

I get the book in the mail on Wednesday. I decided to take the night off from working on the house and start reading it. Well, how should I put this...Literary smut? Maybe not quite that bad but...Oh! My! Gosh!! I got about half-way through the book on the first night and by the time I put it down, I was sore from just reading about this guys 10-1/2" x 4" member. Seriously...I knew the things written in a romance novel were pretty far fetched, but give me a break. I told Jake about it and he couldn't stop laughing when I read a few paragraphs out loud to him. (I had to read it out loud because Jake is one of the annoying people that can't stand to not have a remote in his hand...and the word book is not even in his vocabulary!) He said if it were a porno that it would star Ron Jeremy.

Since I had the day off and none of my friends will help me out painting a ceiling, (*ahem* see yesterdays post), I decided to take another day off from the house of hell and finish the book. I enjoyed it. Hang on, I have to say that again because I am completely surprised. I enjoyed it. Despite my lack of experience reading such things, I felt as if I had picked up an erotica novel, (although I was informed that it was actually pretty mild compared to some that are out there), I was proud of myself for actually completed it. I have a stack of books that I have bought and started reading that I put down because they were something that I was not used to reading and I couldn't force myself to read them. This one was a pretty easy read, if not I am sure that I would have discarded it to the pile stacked in the closet of books that "I will finish someday". Good thing I picked an easy one to start...mission of the book club: accomplished.

Tonight before bed though, it's back to my historical biography of Magellan's around the world journey. And tomorrow, I think, Agatha Christie...

Bitches, bitches, bitches!

(Not you, Carma.)

This post is dedicated to all of my "friends" out there who don't know how to honor their word. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!! I am so sick and fucking tired of someone saying that they will do something and then backing out at the last minute, or worse, ignore me when I try to ask about it.

No, I am not trying to "Huckleberry Finn" anyone, and I resent that insinuation. I guess I just don't understand why I am the first one for these people in question to call when they need help with something, and I almost always help them. So, why can't they return the favor. Crimeny, it's not like I am asking for their firstborn! It would be one thing if you had a legitimate excuse, like an injury or pregnancy...but saying that you are tired from sitting on a couch all day! Give me a break, people. Get off you fat lazy ass and do something! Oh, and don't EVER ask me for anything again and expect me not to bring this up!

Now, before you go passing judgements wondering how I can say this while I stepped out of another friends wedding. I talked to her about my decision and the reasons why I made that decision. She may never talk to me again, but I am willing to deal with that. At least I had the decency to answer the phone when she called, and I had legitimate reasons as to why I decided not to be in the wedding.

I guess that I am just bummed about the quality of friendships anymore. I remember older people telling me that it is rare to still be friends with the same people that you were friends in high school once you have gotten older and started you lives. I never believed that. I refused to. Well, unfortunately, it's true, and I'm here to tell ya, it's depressing and it sucks!

(Once again, I must say: not you, Carma.)

Cash is King

GIVE ME A FREAKING BREAK!!! I am so sick and tired of hearing those three words that I think I will just have to barf on the next person that says them. One of the guys I work with...we'll just call him "fruit boy", or FB for short, sold a house to someone that has given him a lot of contacts.

Let me just clear this up now, I AM NOT JEALOUS, I just get sick and tired of him walking through the office yelling "Cash is king and my customers have cash." Anyway, my personal opinion of FB is that he is merely lucky, and defiantly not a good sales person. I just bothers me that he acts the way he does about things. Last month I sold more houses than any of the others, and I won a brand new flat screen tv, and did anyone once ever hear me brag about it?

I think not!

Updates on the New House

This is sort of a before and after picture of the hardwood floors. jake is busting his ass at refinishing them and in a whole week the only thing that really got done was the upstairs hallway, (it is a big hallway). Refinishing the floors is by far the most time consuming monster we are having to attack!

My new kitchen faucet, isin't it beautiful!

My new bathroom faucet! I have always loved this faucet since the first time I saw it at Home Depot. it doesn';t look very good in this picture because it it really dusty because of jake sanding down and stripping the floors. I will post a better picture of it once it is clean.

Jake and Lana working on the ceiling. This was a real bitch for Lana and I because we spent so much time painting it so carefully...only to have the bright white paint dry yellow. Now we have to go over all of that with an oil based primer before we can actually paint the ceiling. ARGH!!

This is what the living room looked like when we started...

This is what the living room looks like now...

This is what the living room and den will look like by the weekend.

10 Things I'll Never do and Why

1. Anal sex (Umm...does this really need an explination? Do the words "EXIT ONLY" mean anything at all?)

2. Vote for someone who advocates gun control Why, you ask: Because I am a God-fearin', knife-totin', gun-slingin', dear-huntin', home-protectin', good-old Souther girl!! And in the words of the Motor City Madman himself, "SUCK MY GUNS, HILARY!!"

3. Hurt an animal or a child (Again, I think this is self explanitory)

4. Attend a non-Christian church I do believe that it is important to have a knowlege of other religins and beliefs, but I am not interested in exploring them any further. I have attended a Morman and a Unitarian church with different friends in the past, and both were very uncomfortable situations for me. I know that I am already where I need to be, so I don't feel the need to explore any other religins unless to just read about it.

5. Be a Bridezilla This is something that I feel very strongly about right now. Here's my take on this: It may be "Your big day", but there are other people living it too, so take a pill and quit your bitchin'!!

6. Buy another pet from a breeder I once read a bumper sticker that said something to the effect of "Why buy a dog from a breeder when hundreds live in a shelter and die everyday". That touched my heart. I made up my mind then that I will never buy another animal from a breeder. Besides, it has been my experience thatmutts make much better dogs anyways! (But I do still love my little Peanut.)

7. Drink another "Floating Sunrise" from the Rustlers Rooste again for some strange reason, flaming Bicardi 151 and I don't get along too well.

8. Breastfeed OUCH! BARF! GAG! How uncomfortable and embarassing that must be!

9. Decide to go with Jake on weekends to Indianapolis to work on a house for a black man whom he met at a bar (This man was in the bar because he had gotten pulled over 200 miles from home, and somehow his vehicle was impounded.) Hmm...that's an interesting one!

10. Go to a racetrack--horses or cars Cars are just too freaking boring. And horses, well, one word: Barbaro.