The 3rd Shift Crazies!

I have not blogged once all summer!! I have been so busy that my blog has been the furthest thing from my mind. In fact, I had pretty well forgotten I had a blog until someone reminded me about it last night...

I have always said that the crazies got to Wal-Mart late at night and I tend to avoid the place altogether from the hours of 10PM to 8AM. Last night though I went with my sister to pick up an answering machine and a dog bed. We walked in and my sister saw someone she knew so she started talking to her. I waited patiently by our cart and noticed a girl that I used to know walk in. It's no secret that this girl and I had a bit of a falling out that didn't even involve either one of us but more her husband and my boyfriend. (Actually, just to clarify some stuff in case she is reading this, it was because of some pretty snarky stuff her husband did to my BF.) I ignored her. I have nothing to say to this girl. She showed her true colors back maybe a year or so ago so I washed my hands with the whole thing and she is nothing to me.

Kristin went about our business when all of a sudden this girl comes up to us and starts screaming at me in the middle of Wal-Mart about me making fun of her Autistic kid on my blog. At first I had no idea what she was talking about. Then I remembered...after all the shit went down between her hubby and my BF I did what I tend to do when something is bothering me, I blogged about it. And I let it all hang out.

I am not going to go into all of it now because the way she handled everything last night just makes me sick to my stomach. I talked to her like a civilized person until she started raising her voice and attracting quite a bit of attention and accusing me of something that I didn't do. So I just wanted to get on here and clear some things up for my own sanity because I can't seem to get it off my mind.

I did make some comments about her kids on my blog. I DID NOT make fun of any of them. Everything I said was true. What I DID DO was call her a BAD PARENT. I NEVER said I was better than her or any one else. I was venting. Maybe it was the wrong way to go about things, I can accept that, but I will not apologize and I will not take down any post I have ever written. I still maintain that she is a bad parent, and a bad person. Just by the way she handled things last night. I can accept the fact that something I did or said or wrote upset her and she felt the need to confront me about it. But why the hell wait a year and then make a scene in a grocery store? Seriously! And with your daughter standing right there. Way to be a upstanding parent!!

The thing that gets me is that she said that I was lucky I didn't use her kids' names in my blog because I would have been arrested. Okay. What a psychopath!!! And, for the record, I am not a kid person. Even when we were friendly I didn't know her kids' names because I didn't give a flying fuck!!! I still don't!!

ARGH!!! So here I am, taking to the blog once again to vent out my frustrations...which I have not had since I lost my job. And I am sure I am not handling this right, but trust me, there is a hell of a lot more I could say, and that I would love to say, but I am not going to bring myself down to that level.

I guess I am glad that I did get a chance to know this girl and her husband. I am not calling myself better than them in any way because Jake and I are on a completely different level than what they are with them being parents and us not. BUT, if we do ever have kids at least they have taught me what it is to be a bad parent and I know I will not follow their example. Then I will be better than them. And should I have a child born with any kind of handicap, they will never play in their shit because I will not ignore them.

So, just a reminder...stay away from Wal-Mart during the 3rd shift hours. Not only are the people who work there often times a little different, but even some of the customers are psycho bitches!!!

Angels (books) and Demons (movies)

Ever read a book that you absolutely loved that was later turned into a movie that you were dying to see, but when you eventually saw it you were sick over it?

If you are going to make a movie from a book, then I kinda think that in order for you to advertise that it is, for example, "Based on the bestselling novel by Dan Brown", then it should actually BE as close to the book as possible and not re-written for the movie!!!

If you haven't guessed it yet, I am a fan of the book Angels and Demons by Dan Brown. I am a fan of all of Dan Brown's books, including The DaVinci Code. When it was made into a movie I couldn't wait to see it and once I did I was in a bad mood for a week and constantly telling Jake, who is not a reader, how the story really took place and how it was nothing like what the movie made it out to be. I had a feeling it would be the same with Angels and Demons but I wanted to go and see it anyway.

And if you hadn't guessed it yet, we went to see it Saturday night. We even skipped Cyclefest for it! (This is the first year since we have been back in Auburn that we were not out partying at Cricket's wishing we had our own Harley's.) The only thing I can saw that is truly pleasant (and totally surprising), is that I genuinely liked Tom Hanks in this one. He is one of my least favorite people on the planet and typically I ignore everything he does. (I don't know, maybe it was the fact that he didn't have a mullet in this movie like he did in DaVinci Code.) I spent the majority of the movie growing at the screen, rolling my eyes, and trying to explain to Jake why certain things were not making sense to him...even thought it was making sense and I was the one confusing him by trying to tell him what the book really meant!

I stormed out of the theater and into the truck huffing and puffing about how the book was an angel and the demons were the Hollywood yay-who's who ruined the real story while Jake huffed and puffed on a cigarette. Now I KNOW they can make a movie from a long and detailed story without ruining it, they did it with all the Harry Potter movies so far with the exception of # 3 and parts of # 5. If I were Dan Brown, I would be steamed!!!

Okay, rant over. That must have been bothering me bad enough to make me get out of bed at 3 AM and whine about it on here...

Bang! Bang!

Monday morning I went to work like every other Monday morning. I had my coffee, I started up my PC, I said good morning to the up-teen coworkers who walk past my desk, I began preparing all the documents for the sales meeting. This Monday morning my phone rang. It was the boss asking me to meet her and the other boss in the office. Not a good thing to hear first thing on a Monday morning.

I began racking my brain wondering what I had done to cause such a prime meeting time. Maybe they finally caught on to the fact that I screwed around the majority of my work days blog surfing and emailing my Aunt Amanda. Maybe they read some of the emails I had traded with another coworker who hates her job as much as I hated mine. I didn't care. Whatever. I was begging to get fired. I hated working there so much that it took over every thing I thought and did. I had become this grouchy, unhappy person because I wasn't able to just let the crap go that I had to deal with there.

Well, I was fired. But it wasn't for any of the screwing around that I had done, or anything that I had intentionally done to try to get myself into trouble over. I was fired for filling out a time sheet incorrectly. I had worked at this place for two years. I had been filling my time sheets out the exact same way the entire time. You know that feeling I have mentioned having about how I just knew they wanted to get rid of me? Apparently that was right.

The bosses told me that they cared for me on a personal level and wished me the best of luck, but professionally they had to do what was right for the company, which I totally understand. (Not the whole "caring about me on a personal level", because there was no hiding the fact that they did NOT like me.) The thing I don't understand is that there were people doing a hell of a lot worse things that went by basically unpunished. There was one guy, and this is my favorite example, who went to Wisconsin for a training class. He was supposed to be there for a whole week, but he took upon himself to decide that he had learned enough and he wanted to go home on Thursday night. He left, didn't tell anyone at work, didn't came to work that Friday, didn't change his time sheet. He got paid for the day and he just stayed home. Work would have never known had the hotel not called to tell them that they were going to reimburse them for the day that was not used. HE didn't get fired.

Now don't get me wrong, I honestly DO NOT care that I got fired. I had never been fired from anywhere before, and it is a little embarrassing, but I didn't care. They did me a favor really. But I am all about equality in the workplace, and what they did was far from equality. Jake was all about me calling a lawyer and suing them and blah, blah, blah. No, thank you!

I cannot put into words how sickeningly HAPPY I am to not have a job!! I know that sounds weird considering the state of the economy and how there are so many people out there that need jobs. I felt bad going to work everyday knowing how much I hated it and how badly I wanted to quit because I knew there were people out there that would do anything just to have my paycheck. I have wanted to quit for the longest time and Jake wouldn't let me. Well, now I guess he has no say in the matter.

That's not true. He has plenty to say. He and I sit down together every night after I clean up supper dishes and we decide different things that need to be done. Since I got home from my former job at 9:10 AM on Monday, I have gotten more things done than what I have in months of weekends! I have had our garage door repaired, hired a guy to do the painting by the stairs that I am too scared to do myself since it's so high, met with a guy about our water problem and ordered a water softener, I have read, cleaned, scoured, organized, YOU NAME IT!!!! And there is still so much more to do!!! We have decided that I am not going to go back to work until my unemployment runs out, in a YEAR!!! And by the time that rolls around, we may have decided to just prolong it even more...depending on what courses our lives choose to take.

For years I have longed for a part time job, or no job, or even just a day off during the week so that I can make appointments, go to appointments, run errands at places that are only opened at the same time that I had to be holed up in my windowless office!! I know this sounds crazy, but today I had to go to the post office and it was the highlight of my day!! Not only that, but my two BFFs, Jeannie and Brenda, neither one work and I now have the opportunity to spend time with them that I never had before in the past.

I have even considered sending the place of my former employment a thank you card for allowing me this liberation, but Jake told me that might be going just a little too far! :)

Something Loaned, again and again

Something Borrowed

by: Emily Giffin

Rachel has always been a good girl--until her thirtieth birthday, when her best friend Darcy throws her a party. That night, after too many drinks, Rachel ends up in bed with Darcy's fiancé Dex. Rachel is horrified to discover that she has genuine feelings for Dex. She prays for fate to intervene, but when she makes a choice she discovers that the lines between right and wrong are blurry, endings aren't always neat, and you have to risk all to win true happiness.

This book has been on my "TO READ" list for months, but I could never bring myself to read it for some reason. I was constantly being shoved down another few spaces whenever I was getting close to having to read it. I had convinced myself it was "chick lit" and something I was just not really interested in. Saturday I was at Target with Brenda when I noticed each of Emily Giffin's books on sale for $10. "What the hell?" I thought as I put Something Borrowed and Something Blue in my cart. Late Saturday night I started reading Something Borrowed and I barely stopped until it was finished. It took me less than 16 hours to devour this wonderful book. I began immediately on Something Blue, but my feelings for that one aren't quite as strong as they were before.

Something Borrowed is about a woman called Rachel that I could easily identify with. She is turning 30, hates her job, feels like there should be more to her life than what there is, and she has always been a people pleaser. I am not to the 30-year-bench mark yet, but I can certainly relate to the job hating and the feeling like there should be more at this point in time. Typically in a book or a movie where there is a couple of friends, one with a fiance who is sleeping with both of them, you would hate the guy and the girl he's not engaged to for even the thought of cheating. I was shocked to be rooting for Dex and Rachel the entire time! I would smile when they were together and I would cringe when he was with Darcy. Darcy was one of those characters you love to hate. Every girl has a Darcy as a friend, so once again I felt myself relating, (and sighing with relief that I finally let that friendship go after too many years).

I can't wait to read this book again. Something Borrowed is definitely something loaned as I have told all of my friends how they MUST read it and I have told them as much as I can about it without giving too much away. Every girl should read this book!

Just because it's one of those days...

Did you know they even have PB&J truffles made with wild mixed berry jelly?

*Heaven!*

You Speak My Language!

Here's a virtual high five to Tyler Connolly, the lead singer of Theory of a Deadman! Have you head his song "Hate My Life"? I am a magnet for bad days and that song is my anthem for all of them! I think he took a page from my diary when he wrote "I still hate my job, my boss is a dick! I don't get paid near enough to put up with all of his shit!" Like I said, it's my anthem!

These guys have quickly become my favorites to listen to. It's a rare occasion that I tune into Rush Limbaugh in the afternoons now that I have their cds! (I think Jake loves that since I stopped ranting about all the stuff I get amped about when I listen to him!)

Someone near and dear to my heart went to a concert of theirs in South Bend last week and brought me home this shirt:


I don't necessarily think the message applies to me, since it's pretty obvious when I am drunk and I never get stoned, and since I always leave the bar with the same person I showed up with...but I love it anyway! Derek told me they have ones that say "Dick Magnet" on them too...guess i'm glad that's not the one that was given to me!

"Cowboy Butts Drive Me Nuts"

It's RODEO season!! And you know what that means...
:-)

Not a girl, not yet a wino!

But almost! Jake and I were bored a few weeks ago and we decided to check out this winery not too far from where we live, Satek Winery in Fremont. It was fun to go and see the way they do things and to get to taste the wines. You can sample up to 10, they are currently offering 26 varieties. I have never seen their wines for sale at the grocery stores in Auburn, but I have seen them in the local liquor store. Anyway, while we were there Jake and I bought a few bottles of the 101 Lakes Red.

I have always been a fan of Oliver Winery's Soft Red, but Satek's 101 Lake Red was WAY BETTER (in my opinion. Oliver still makes a hell of a wine!)

So all you wino's out there, try a bottle. You will not be disappointed if you like sweet wines. If you a around Fremont, IN it's worth a stop into see the folks at Satek's.

Baskin Robbins Honors Barack Obama With A New Flavor

In honor of the 44th President of the United States , Baskin-Robbins Ice Cream has issued a new flavor, " Barocky Road ."
Barocky Road is a blend of half vanilla, half chocolate, and surrounded by nuts and flakes. The vanilla portion of the mix is not openly advertised and usually denied as an ingredient. The Nuts and Flakes are all bitter and hard to swallow.
The cost is $100 per scoop. When purchased, it will be presented to you in a large beautiful cone, but then the Ice Cream is taken away and given to the person in line behind you. Thus you are left with an empty wallet, no change, holding an empty cone, with no hope of getting any ice cream.
Aren't you feeling stimulated?

Tehehe! You know how i'm a sucker for any joke about Obama! =)

Hill is the second child of authors Stephen and Tabitha King. He grew up in Bangor, Maine. His younger brother Owen is also a writer. Hill has three sons.
Hill chose to use an abbreviated form of his given name (a reference to executed labor leader Joe Hill, for whom he was named) in 1997, out of a desire to succeed based solely on his own merits rather than as the son of Stephen King. After achieving a degree of independent success, Hill publicly confirmed his identity in 2007 after an article the previous year in Variety broke his cover (although online speculation about Hill's family background had been appearing since 2005).[1]
Middle-aged rock star Judas Coyne collects morbid curios, so he doesn't think twice about buying a suit advertised at an online auction site as haunted by its dead owner's ghost. Only after it arrives does Jude discover that the suit belonged to Craddock McDermott, the stepfather of one of Coyne's discarded groupies, and that the old man's ghost is a malignant spirit determined to kill Judas in revenge for his stepdaughter's suicide. Judas and his girlfriend take to the road in an attempt to run from the ghost and to find a way to stop it.

The above information is from Wikipedia. If I would have read that "Joe Hill" is really "Joe King", I probably would not have read the book. I devoured it in 3 days. Loved it. BUT, parts of it were terrifying. In fact, there was a night that I didn't sleep well at all and I know it's because of what was going on in the book. While I don't know that I would read another one of his books, (Horror stories just aren't my things, and I hate reading about dogs getting shot or kicked.), it was very well written and while it was complex it was easy to follow. I finished it this afternoon when I was at lunch, and I have been recommending it to everyone that I know who likes to read and isn't easily freaked out by the ghosts of scary old men!

Corks for Charity

While I was digging around online looking for a place to buy my new favorite wine, I came across this website. How may wine drinkers out there have gobs of corks laying around with nothing to do with them? I know we do. I have a centerpiece on my dining room table filled with corks, a vase filled with them, shoe boxes filled. And you are sure to find a few in any given kitchen drawer! I did once see in a Pottery Barn catalog a bulletin board made of corks, so I have been saving some up so I can make one for myself rather than paying close to $100 for one! I figure, if you are going to spend $100 on corks, you might as well get the wine along with it!

Anyway, yesterday when I was looking to buy The Show I came across the above mentioned website. Here's what I found out about it...

A Nashville area foundation called Sports 4 All has come up with an ingenious way to raise money. They are asking for your used wine corks. They are gathering corks from local restaurants, individuals and retailers, sorting them, and then they sell them to artists all over the country and beyond. "There is an artist in California who has a large standing order we can't fill at the moment", Sara Koppelman, Program Manager told me recently. Sports 4 All raises money and solicits sporting equipment and provides equipment and recreational opportunities for disabled persons of all ages.
Sara and Sports 4 All President Kris Salisbury do most of the work at Sports 4 All, but all of the proceeds of their work goes into the foundation. They don't receive payment for their work. The two came together about 2 years ago when Koppelman was working at a Down's Syndrome camp and needed equipment. She met Kris and they began working together on the foundation that Salisbury, a Down's Syndrome parent had begun over 10 years ago. Sara and Kris share a love for wine, and it was over a glass that they had the bright idea now known as "Corks 4 Charity".
It has worked. Now they are putting the word out to do more of it. "The market is there", Sara told me. We have signed up local restaurants like J. Alexander's and Park Cafe, and put the word out to local tasting events and to our friends. On a bi-weekly basis, Sports 4 All makes a “cork run” (cork retrieval trip) and collects the corks which then get separated into groups of 100. The lots of 100 corks are then sold to artists for creative projects including: picture frame ornamentation, furniture design, dartboard backsplashes, wreaths, and many other artistic endeavors. When we get a bunch of corks, we get together for "cork therapy", when we sort them out, separating out the real corks from the synthetic ones. "We market on eBay, and when artists find out we have corks available, we become a supplier to them. "We can sell as many corks as we can gather."
"Corks 4 Charity creates a community of recycling and giving, providing unique corks to creative minds and artists, raising awareness of Sports 4 All Foundation, and offering a reliable funding source to fulfill Sports 4 All’s Mission: to improve the quality of life of individuals with disabilities by providing funding and equipment to enable full participation in sports and recreation activities. Corks 4 Charity is an easy was to give back to the community and recycle – simultaneously."

Should you have corks you wish to donate, or you have questions, you may contact:

Sports 4 All Foundation Kris Salisbury & Sara Koppelman 5827 Charlotte Pike Nashville, TN 615-354-6454 http://www.s4af.org

I'm a Karen!

YIKES!

Uncork this!

As many of you may already know, I LOVE wine. Jake and I were regular tasters with the Dekalb County Wine Society, (although I think they may have dis-banded?), and you have probably seen the pictures...

I picked up a bottle of this at World Market ages ago because I liked the cowboy on the bottle. I was hooked from the first taste. I never could find it again though, not even at that same store. UNTIL, they were going out of business and they had 1 bottle left. Of course I bought it!! I googled it and here's what I found...

Rebel Wine Co. – The Show Cabernet Sauvignon
Technically speaking, The Show 2005 Cab is 80% Cabernet, the vast majority from Monterey and Paso Robles with a smidgen from Napa, plus 8% Merlot from Monterey, 6% Cab Franc from Napa, 3% Petite Sirah from Dry Creek and 3% Petite Verdot from Napa. The 10,000 cases produced saw French and American oak prior to bottling.
Excellent value ($15). Closure: Real cork. Alcohol content: 13.9%.
Style: Lush, fruit forward, with some oak spice.
Tasting Notes: Appearance: Deep ruby with a purple tint, translucent. Aromas: Black cherry, blackcurrant, vanilla, sweet tobacco and hints of sage flowers. Spicy, moderately tart and medium-bodied, the mouth filling dried red to black fruit and spicy oak flavors lead to a bucking good finish.
Comment: The only watch out is the classy heavyweight bottle. You might think there is still some wine left in it and find yourself empty handed.
You can bet I will be asking our local Gay's Hops and Schnapps to start carrying this one!

Missy Come Home!

My darling Beagle, Missy Wylde has been missing for about a week. I have been devastated! This has happened before as she has a hunkering for getting off her chain when she's outside, but someone close by has always found her and called either us or the shelter. When I came home and found her gone I immediately called the shelter, the vet's office, and the police station. I have yet to get any calls back.

Yesterday when I was driving through Auburn, I glanced over and saw a woman driving a car with a big Irish Setter in the back seat and a long-legged Beagle with a hot pink collar in the front seat. I a 99.99% SURE this was my long-legged Beagle. She was wearing a hot pink collar with a purple name tag hanging from it. So was MY dog!

I doubt there's any chance the person driving that car will read this, but just in case I have to say: Please, PLEASE bring my dog back to me. She may bring joy to you and you may think that's worth keeping her, but also remember that she brought joy to me, and now she is gone.

My Little Darlings

Please ignore the FILTHY floor! Missy and Peanut had been outside all this afternoon playing like crazy and they were both pooped! Aren't the adorable?

WTF? Seriously!

The view of my back yard on this Monday morning April 6, 2009. As I said: WTF?!

Florida Court Sets Atheist Holy Day

In Florida, an atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter & Passover holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews & observances of their holy days. The argument was it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized day.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring, "Case dismissed."

The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter & others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur & Hanukkah. Yet my client & all other atheists have no such holidays."

The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, "But you do, counsel, your client is woefully ignorant." The lawyer said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists."

The judge said, "The calendar says April 1st is 'April Fools Day.' Psalm 14:1 states 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned!

Guess what I am going to be doing in 164 days...

That's right! METALLICA will be at the Conseco Fieldhouse

in Indianapolis, IN on Thursday, September 17.

You can't tell that I am just a *little* excited, can you?

READ THIS BOOK!

The Innocent by Harlan Coben

My sister, who is not a reader, turned me onto this author. She read his book The Woods and was hooked from then on. She went out and bought all of his books that were in stock at Borders and devoured them in days. (This is the same girl that took 2 years to read The Smoke Jumper!) I read The Woods, and I liked it, but it was nothing that I would write a blog post about. Sunday morning I picked up The Innocent and barely put it down all day. When I turned off the light that night I was 3/4 of the way through it.

Now I am not good at giving quick little blurbs about books that I like because I am bad at just telling what happens so I am not going to say anything except READ IT. If you want a review or a summary, look it up on Amazon. AND, don't just stop with The Innocent. Why not consider joining me in devouring all of Harlan Coben's books just like my sister did! I already have the list printed out and the first ones I am going for are the Myron Bolitar series, because you know how I love series books.

Which brings me to something else I was thinking about the other night. It was probably about a year ago that I posted about how I was going to start posting about books that I am reading and what I think of them. Just in case anyone cares what/who I am reading and what I think of them/it. I haven't really done that, but as I go to the library probably 3 times a week I am really starting to regret that. I have checked out more books that I have already read than I even care to admit to. Of course the ones that I really like (Beach Road, The Quickie being the only ones I did actually post about), or series that I have gotten into (Stephanie Plum by Janet Evanovich and Kinsey Millhone by Sue Grafton), I remember reading and I can tel you about what happened in them and I don't accidentally re-check them out.

SO, I have typed list of books and authors that I want to read that is about 10 pages long! Most of the books come from recommendations or from the Book Bitches' Blog. Any author that I have been recommended like Harlan Coben, or if I have read something of theirs and really liked it, I have challenged myself to read everything they have written. I have been highlighting my list also to help me keep track, but I am going to try and post something about the books on here too. I will try to spend some time going back through books I have already read and post a little something about them too.

While I am on the subject of my love of reading and books...I just want to say that I am SO HAPPY for my friend Brenda and my sister Kristin!! Brenda wasn't much of a reader, but then I introduced her to Mark from Elizabeth Valdez's Passion and Janet Evanovich's first Stephanie Plum novel One For The Money and she was hooked. She bought a huge lot of Janet Evanovich's paperbacks, and she has started re-reading some of her old favorites and even sharing them with me...but we'll save that for another post! *wink, wink* And just the fact that my sister picked up a book and read the whole thing in an amount of time that she probably didn't forget what it was about before she was done is wonderful in itself. But what is even better with her is that she found a really good author and was finally able to share with me!

Friday Funnies

I took my dad to the mall the other day, to buy some new shoes [he is 92]. We decided to grab a bite at the food court.
I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors; green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.
When the teenager had finally had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man? Never done anything wild in your life?"
Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food, so that I would not choke on his response [knowing he would have a good one].
And, in classic style, he did not bat an eye in his response; "I got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son."

And this one is even funnier! Listen to the guy in the middle laugh!

This POOR kid!

I think I would simply kill my parents if they posted something like this of me! Can you imagine growing up as the kid who freaked out on dental medicine on the Internet? Too funny!!

BEWARE!!! WARNING!!! BEWARE!!!

Over the weekend the doting owner of two young lab mixes purchased Cocoa Mulch from Target to use in their garden. They loved the way it smelled and it was advertised to keep cats away from their garden. Their dog Calypso decided that the mulch smelled good enough to eat and devoured a large helping. She vomited a few times which was typical when she eats something new but wasn't acting lethargic in any way. The next day, Mom woke up and took Calypso out for her morning walk . Half way through the walk, she had a seizure and died instantly.

Although the mulch had NO warnings printed on the label, upon further investigation on the company's website, this product is HIGHLY toxic to dogs and cats.

Cocoa Mulch is manufactured by Hershey's, and they claim that 'It is true that studies have shown that 50% of the dogs that eat Cocoa Mulch can suffer physical harm to a variety of degrees (depending on each individual dog). However, 98% of all dogs won't eat it.' (What is the Hershey Company known famously for making? CHOCOLATE! What is one of the biggest no-no's to feed your pets? CHOCOLATE! What is the name of the mulch in question? COCOA Mulch! What is CHOCOLATE made from? COCOA!)

This Snopes site gives the following information:http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/cocoamulch.asp

Cocoa Mulch, which is sold by Home Depot, Foreman's Garden Supply and other Garden supply stores, contains a lethal ingredient called ' Theobromine'. It is lethal to dogs and cats. It smells like chocolate and it really attracts dogs. They will ingest this stuff and die. Several deaths already occurred in the last 2-3 weeks. Theobromine is in all chocolate, especially dark or baker's chocolate which is toxic to dogs. Cocoa bean shells contain potentially toxic quantities of theobromine, a xanthine compound similar in effects to caffeine and theophylline. A dog that ingested a lethal quantity of garden mulch made from cacao bean shells developed severe convulsions and died 17 hours later. Analysis of the stomach contents and the ingested cacao bean shells revealed the presence of lethal amounts of theobromine.

Anyone who thinks country music *isn't* sexy...listen to this!

Political Correctness

The following is the winning entry in an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year's term was "Political Correctness":

"Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."

Huh... =)

A Litte Irish Humor for St. Patrick's Day...

As a bagpiper, I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a cemetery in the remote countryside and this man would be the first to be laid to rest there.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods area, I became lost and being a typical man, did not stop for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and the crew who were eating lunch but the hearse was nowhere in sight.

I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid already in place.

I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long but this was the proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their lunch. I played out my heart and soul.

As I played the workers began to weep. I played and I played like I'd never played before, from Going Home and The Lord is My Shepherd to Flowers of the Forest. I closed the lengthy session with Amazing Grace and walked to my car.

As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the workers saying to another, "Sweet Jeezuz, Mary'n Joseph, I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."

I have multiple personalities!!

According to this, I have 21 different personalities!! Of course, these 21 are the self-diagnosed ones. Ask some of my firends and family and they might tell you differently. =)

I never knew I was retro until I saw these!

Hundreds Attend Global Warming Protest

Bizkit the Sleep Walking Dog!

BEWARE 1800petmeds.com!

The following was copied and pasted from an email I sent to my lovely Aunt Amanda. I wanted to pass along the information to as many people as possible because I am sure there are plenty of others out there that love their pets as much as I do and do not want to get screwed-over by this place!

************

On TV you see that 1800petmeds advertised...DO NOT BUY STUFF FROM THERE!!!!!! I just ordered my dogs pills through there and when you place an order they fax your vet for them to sign off that it is okay for your dogs to have what you are ordering. Well, Saturday morning Missy's vet called me and told me all kinds of stuff about them!! BAD STUFF. Apparently their prices are not as good as what they say... (My vet saved me almost $30 on both Missy and Peanut's pills), plus he told me that they have been into some trouble with forging vet's signatures and some other unethical stuff. Plus what they were recommending for my dogs was SO WRONG!!! There are 3 types of worms dogs can get, and the pills they were selling me were only treated 1 kind...the most common...heart worms. If you buy the pills directly from the vet's office you can get a rebate on them, plus if your dog would happen to still get any kind of worms that the medicine treats, the manufacturer will pay the cost of treatment. If you buy from an online pharmacy, there is not guarantee. I was so shocked that the vet called me from his house on a Saturday morning when he didn't even have office hours. Peanut goes to a different vet, but we were planning to switch him to this other guy, Dr. Hargarten, when it was time for him to go back in for his yearly shots because the girls that work in the office at his vet are so rude and just act like they don't even like animals! When we got Missy we started her with Dr. Hargarten because we had to get her fixed within just a couple of weeks after getting her because she came from the shelter. I decided that I liked the doctor and the people in the office well enough that I didn't care if they were more expensive I was going to go ahead and switch Peanut. Now I can't wait to switch him!!! (Hopefully he won't BITE this guy...he really didn't like the doctor that he saw at the Animal Care Clinic!!)

Anyway, I hope all that makes sense!! Just a heads up!!

Peanut chillin' on my in my office.
Missy chowing down on Jake's socks.
She's too cute to yell at sometimes!

Peanut doesn't let anything get by that window!

Missy could care less!

The BIBLE and the Financial Crisis

'In the blink of an eye wealth disappears, it will sprout wings and fly away like an eagle.' Proverbs 23:4 & 5
Now take out some paper money, any paper money and look at the symbol of the Federal Reserve System. What do you see? A winged eagle. On your money that is flying away. Hmmm. You think maybe God knew what he was talking about?
I now calculate that if I don't leave any inheritance for my children, I might possibly be able to retire when I am around 93. Kinda depressing. But God talks about that too: 'Money is put into risky investments that turn sour, and everything is lost. In the end, there is nothing left to pass on to one's children.' Ecclesiastes 5:14
I think we can all agree: it is scary out there! Banks are collapsing, businesses are failing, and investments are plummeting. Our economy and our lifestyles are changing, and no one can predict what will happen next. We are all hurting and scrambling to cope. If we are depending on our money for our security, we are in deep weeds. As King Solomon warns us: 'Trust in your money and down you go!' Proverbs 11:28
Listening to the latest financial predictions of the supposed experts can drive you to despair, can't it? So what is the solution? Let's listen to Jesus instead. What does Jesus have to say to us at a time like this?
'Don't trust in your unreliable investments. Trust me. Teach those who are rich in this world not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which is so unreliable. Their trust should be in God, who richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment.' 1 Tim. 6:17
'Use this wake up call to recalibrate your heart for true riches. Don't store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.' Matt. 6:19-21
'true godliness with contentment is itself great wealth.' 1Timothy 6:6
'Don't lay awake worrying about what you can't control. Take it one day at a time. So don't worry about tomorrow' Matt 6:34
'don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.' (The Message paraphrase)
'Bring your financial needs to me, and leave them with me. Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you willexperience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.' Philippians 4:6,7
'I haven't forgotten you. I already know your needs and I promise I'll meet your needs. So don't worry about these things, saying, 'What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?' These things dominate thethoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else,and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need'
Matthew 6:31&32
'this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to usin Christ Jesus.' Philippians 4:19
Not all of our wants, but all of our needs. Not some of our needs, all of our needs. Not from scarce resources, but from his glorious riches. So how should we live during this economic crisis? Jesus tells us:
'I tell you not to worry about…whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear… Look at the birds. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren't you far more valuable to him than they are?... And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you.
And that is a promise we can bank on.

--Dick Loizeaux

Kids say the darndest things!

My cousin emailed this to me this afternoon and it brought quite a smile to my face!

WHY GOD MADE MOMS
All answers given by second grade school children.

Why did GOD make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean house.
3. To help us out of there when we're getting born.

How did GOD make mothers?
1. He used dirt just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. GOD made Mom just the same like he made me, he just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. GOD made mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everythign nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly used string I think.

Why did GOD give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. GOD knew she likes me a lot more than other people's mom like me.

What kind of girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
1. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spagetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot.
2. She got to old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom dind't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees stuff under the bed.
3. I guess mom is, but only becasue she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home. Dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scarring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power because that's who you get to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
4. Mom's have magic. They make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it tak to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet maybe blue.

GRR!!!

How come I cam look at all of these other blogs and think they look so cute, but when I try to do something cute and funky with my own it turns out looking stupid? And how come what you see in the create window is not what the post actually looks like on the blog?

That gets frustrating!!

Sister Myotis on "Thong Panties"

My Aunt Rosemary, who is the funniest person I know, emailed me about this!

The above picture on the left is of the woman who recently gave birth to octuplets in California. The picture on the right is obviously of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. I read yesterday that the now mother of 14 has been accused of trying to be Angelina. Of course she denies it, but just look at the two pictures! The hair, the white dress/gown thing, the lips...but she looks a little more like Alanis Morisette than Angelina!

Now here's what I don't understand...

Times are tough all over and this woman already has 6 children. She started going to a fertility clinic because she wanted to have more children so the doctors there fertilized 8 eggs (bear with me here, I am not good with the correct terms for all of this). Typically not all of them would actually become embryos, but in this case they all did. So her defense of saying that she did not intentionally get pregnant with 8 babies could be true.
I read today that her house payment has not been made since last April.
So what I am having trouble understanding is how this woman was paying for her fertility treatments. If she is unemployed and living on government assistance, supporting 6 children, and can't pay her house payment...???
And what doctor in their right mind would allow this? I mean, isn't there some sort of requirements for mental health testing or something, or credit checks...I don't know!
So we read daily about how the government wants to put restrictions on us making us wear seat belts and what kind of guns we can own and how we can't smoke in bars or buy any alcohol on Sundays...whatever, but then we turn the page of the newspaper and read about a woman who can live on government assistance AND be allowed fertility treatments and have 14 kids...

And people wonder why I say I don't want any kids of my own. Take a look around. I can't afford to have my own because my tax dollars are going to pay for cases like this, although not usually to this extreme.

Having some fun...

Just a little something about Indiana weather...

It's wintertime in Indiana
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below.
Oh, how I love Indiana
When the snow's up to your butt.
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.
Yes, the weather here is wonderful,
So I guess I'll hang around.
I could never leave Indiana
'Cause I'm frozen to the ground!

Anyone out there reading this that is NOT familiar with the weather in the Hoosier state, this is a *perfect* parody of what it's truly like. I have lived in this state all my life, and it's always been the same. With the exception of moving from a central-southern location to the north east corner where we get way more wind and lake effects.

On Saturday and Sunday I was outside in a hooded sweatshirt and temps capped at around 44. Today it is snowing and the weatherman said we would be lucky to hit 20! Indiana's weather needs some medication for bi-polar disorder I think! ;)

2009 - GO AWAY!

I am typically excited when it's time for a new year. I jump on the wagon with a slew of resolutions and promises to myself about different things. And like just about everyone else I jump off that wagon a few weeks later, (usually for me I am diving into a bottle of gin and a bag of chips since those seem to be the two things I attempt to stay away from with every new year ;p). This year I made no resolutions, except to save a little more money, which actually had nothing to do with the new year, and just decided to be optimistic about the coming year.

I had a pretty crappy last part of 2008. Sure there were plenty of good things, and plenty to be happy about, but all the good and happy things had this black rain cloud hanging over them like the little blue Care Bear. I got sick and tired of being in bad moods and being depressed, so I vowed to start new for 2009 and make it good despite whatever was going on in my life and the world. (And by world, I mean the inauguration of Barack Obama as our 44th President. I already knew I was probably going to be in a bad mood that day.)

Well, the first month of 2009 will be over in about 36 hours. And just about all of it has SUCKED. Now let me first say that I am not blogging about this to whine or complain. I decided that I was going to start blogging again and the crappy things that have been happening have really been weighing me down lately and I hope blogging about it may make me feel a little better. But, now that I am actually blogging I don't feel like getting into all that crap!

Here goes...

My sister and I were leaving Target one night when I felt a crumbling sensation in my mouth. It was my tooth. The one I had just finished paying off an $1100 bill to the dentist for a root canal. Just as I was grabbing my cell phone to call Jake and tell him, Jake called me. He wanted to tell me that our water heater had just died. Some pipe fitting corroded and burst and there was torrents of water shooting out of the hole and flooding the back room of the basement.

Missy ran away. The tie-out is old and in need of replacing, but I figured it could wait until spring since when I put the dogs out there I stand there and watch them so I can get them right back in after they are finished. Apparently Jake doesn't keep an eye on them, or her rather since it was just Missy he had outside. He put her outside and an hour later got a phone call from a lady 3 streets north of us that our Beagle named Missy was sitting on her back porch with her dogs. Thankfully we got her back. That should have been a clue to me that I needed to get a new tie-out, but I still decided to put it off. Until last night when Jake called me as I was getting back into Dekalb County to let me know that Peanut's life was just saved by Wetzel-the-world's-most-wonderful-neighbor. This time it was Peanut that got put out on the faulty tie-out and he was wandering around the parking lot next to our house. I guess Wetzel, who's a big guy that drives an even bigger truck, pulled in and almost ran him over because he's small enough that he can't even see him from the cab of the truck. He told me his wife was home and he stopped before pulling up as far as usual just in case their dog was out and there was Peanut chewing on a dead bird and having nothing to do with moving out of the way. I went and bought a new tie-out last night. Thankfully both of my beloved dogs are in my possession and alive.

Our furnace took a crap too. Last week we had Larry Spade of Spade Heating and Plumbing tinkering in our basement 3 different times in a 5-hour time span. This week I forgot to pay the electric bill on time and it was disconnected. I am notorious for writing out the check for that bill and carrying it around in my purse for weeks until I get a disconnect notice before paying it. That is the only bill that we can't pay online, and you have to take it uptown and drop it off at the main office, so it's more of a pain in the winter. When it's warmer out I have no problem getting library books returned on time, getting to the post office, or paying my utility bill before the pink disconnect notice gets mailed out because I am out walking with the dogs anyway. I was so embarrassed because I have never actually had it turned off. Jake was furious. I told him that it can be his responsibility to take it uptown from now on. He stopped bitching at me then. I think it will still be up to me to get it there.

Jake was laid off. I hate my job and blame my constant bad mood on that. We had plans of getting married this winter that we decided against for reasons I am still not clear of. I can't figure out what two people who have been together for 5 years can possibly be so freaked out by marriage over, but as long as we are happy so what I guess. I take that back, we are not really that happy. And we won't be until people stop asking us when we are getting married. I swear the next person who asks I am going to act like I am going to whisper it in their ear and then just scream really loud into it!

Jon Sassanella has moved in with us. At least I think the plan is for him to move in with us. He doesn't really talk to me much, but he and Jake have pow-wows and from what I have been told from Jake and my brother both, that is the direction we are moving in. That's not really a crappy thing. I guess it is a little weird, and I do get sick of video games and music going all the time when I am so used to a quiet house, but it has been fun. And interesting.

Jake and I went to Jeannie and Justin's last week to visit and catch up and to play with Summer the world's cutest baby. It was the first time that Jake had ever seen her other than in pictures. From the first time I saw her I was hooked on her. I was so happy for Jeannie, and that's what made Summer more special than any other baby, but the more times I was around her the more I just wanted to take her home with me! I told Jeannie, Jake, my mom, and my sister time and time again that I would have kids if I could get some kind of written guarantee that it was going to be just like Summer. Well, now that Jake has met her he has jumped on the baby wagon. Only Jake isn't just saying he wants to take Summer home, he is saying he wants kids of his own. Oh boy! We can't even stick to plans to get married...and now he wants to have kids!?! I am still not sure what I think about that one! I think I am perfectly content with the way things are. And my offer to Jeannie about how she can give Summer to me once she's decided she's tired of her still stands.

One more quick thing I wanted to add. Last night I was sitting in the bathtub trying my hardest not to break down and cry because I am so stressed out because if everything that is going on and about my lia sophia business sucking ass, and everything else. Jake came in and I was spilling my guts to him and I said "This is an abomination!" He said, "Oh babe, it's worse than an abomination. It's an Obamanation." Way to make me feel better there! If 2009 is not going to ge tany better, I wish it would just GO AWAY!

President Calls The People of Washington DC "Wimps"

As you are all aware, I am not a supporter or a fan of President Obama. However, I heard him say something yesterday that had even me giggling about. I was on my way home from work listening to Pat White on WOWO and he played this sound clip of Obama. It went something like this:

"I am sorry, but I am going to have to interrupt myself for just a moment. My daughters' school was cancelled today. Apparently Washinton DC experienced an "ice storm" and felt it necessary to close all schools and some businesses. An "ice storm"? Come on people. I am from Chicago. The people of the Midwest know that this is nothing! My 7-year-old even pointed out that in Chicago they would have went outside for recess still in this weather! If they really think this is bad, the people of Washington are wimps!"

Amen. *Chuckle*

More Funny Emails

I have decided that I think I have a problem. For some reason when I read an email that I find funny I save it in my archive folder of my email and when I get bored at work I blog it. I seem to think that anyone reading this blog gives a damn to see forwarded emails that they have probably received themselves, and I think that I need to save the ones that make me chuckle because someday I just might need to read them again. Whatever. I am a dork, and I need to stop wasting blog space with the emails. I need to get back to blogging for real...but I just have not felt like it! But that's another post...
And for now...I share with you some forwarded funnies...

1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive!
6. Earth is the insane asylum for the Universe.
7. I am starting to wonder how bad 4 years with no president would be...
8. God must love stupid people, he made so many!
9. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
10. Consciousness: that annoying thing between naps.
11. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
12. Men are always whining about how we're suffocating them. Personally, I think if you can hear them whining you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow!
13. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.
14. Ever notice how people who tell you to calm down are the ones who got you mad in the first place...

Healthy Insanity (There were quite a few of these, but I am only posting the ones I have done since reading the email.)
1. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
2. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
3. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".
4. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
5. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
6. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
7. Five days in advance, tell your friend you can't attend their party because you are not in the mood.
8. When the money comes out of the ATM, start screaming, "I won! I won!"
**(And I didn't actually do this because I don't have any kids, but it's hilarious...) Tell your children over dinner that due to the economy you are going to have to let one of them go.