I AM SO EXCITED!!!
The new lia Sophia catalog is available for purchase this Friday. It will also be on the company’s website for all customers to view. However, for all of us advisors, today is a VERY special day. Because…the company put a sneak preview of the catalog on the personal websites of all advisors that have personal websites with the company!!
I don’t have a personal website yet, but I was able to check it out on a senior advisors website. I was bummed when the list of jewelry being discontinued was announced. Not only was I going to be losing quite a bit of pieces from my display, there were SO MANY being discontinued that I still wanted to get. When I saw a few snapshots some of the girls that went to conference had of the new jewelry I was pretty bummed. The jewelry was cool, but it was nothing that I could ever see myself wearing.
Oh, boy, was I wrong!! Like I mentioned already, while scrolling through a PDF of the catalog I almost peed my pants after seeing some of the new stuff. Most of the new stuff, actually.
I simply cannot wait to own the new catalog…and everything in it!
Monday, June 23, 2008
Why's of Men
1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
they don't have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
they don't stop to ask directions
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
you need a rough draft before you make a final copy
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
don't know.....it never happened
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
because a vibrator can't mow the lawn
Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart...Then you are just an old sour fart !
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma ..'
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.' The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'
'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
Dear Lord,I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e- mail?
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.'
**Just a side note here...while I do find some of these jokes funny, this is NOT my kind of humor. Some of the jokes are mean...and I wouldn't joke like that about Jake.
because they are plugged into a genius)
2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
they don't have enough time)
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
they don't stop to ask directions
4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock
5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties
6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
you need a rough draft before you make a final copy
7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
don't know.....it never happened
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
because a vibrator can't mow the lawn
Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart...Then you are just an old sour fart !
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat-shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?' 'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma ..'
A couple is lying in bed. The man says,'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.' The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'
'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
Dear Lord,I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e- mail?
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.'
**Just a side note here...while I do find some of these jokes funny, this is NOT my kind of humor. Some of the jokes are mean...and I wouldn't joke like that about Jake.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
An Explination of Life
On the first day, God created the dog and said: 'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'
The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'
So God agreed.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said:
'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'
The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'
And God agreed.
On the third day, God created the cow and said:
'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'
The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day, God created man and said:
'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'
But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'
'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'
So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.
The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'
So God agreed.
On the second day, God created the monkey and said:
'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'
The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'
And God agreed.
On the third day, God created the cow and said:
'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.'
The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'
And God agreed again.
On the fourth day, God created man and said:
'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'
But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'
'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'
So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Something to think about
A father wanted to read a magazine but was being bothered by his little girl, Shelby. She wanted to know what the United States looked like. Finally, he tore a sheet out of his new magazine on which was printed themap of the country. Tearing it into small pieces, he gave it to Shelby andsaid, "Go into the other room and see if you can put this together. This will show you our whole country today." After a few minutes, Shelby returned and handed him the map, correctly fitted and taped together. The father was surprised and asked how she hadfinished so quickly. "Oh," she said, "on the other side of the paper is a picture of Jesus. When I got all of Jesus back where He belonged, then our country just came together."
Monday, June 9, 2008
Proving once again that men just don't know when to keep thier mouths shut...
On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20.00 for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.
Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth o ver $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for the more than three decades she had "charged" him for sex, these holdings had multipliedand these were the results of her savings and investments. Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak.
But finally he found his voice and blurted out, "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!"
That's when she shot him. I hear that she was able to afford one of the state's top attorneys.
This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for more than 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state. During the next few minutes, he explained that his employer was going through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go. It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.
Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed more than thirty years of steady deposits and interest totaling nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued by the bank which were worth o ver $2 million, and informed him that they were one of the largest depositors in the bank. She explained that for the more than three decades she had "charged" him for sex, these holdings had multipliedand these were the results of her savings and investments. Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak.
But finally he found his voice and blurted out, "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business!"
That's when she shot him. I hear that she was able to afford one of the state's top attorneys.
Too funny!
I got this picture as an attachement to an email from my mother. The question I read before opening the picture attachment was, "How can you tell this table was listed by a man?"**HINT**
Look in the mirror in the background. I almost fell off my chair!
Friday, June 6, 2008
The Value of a Drink
I have quit smoking. Successfully so far. I stopped taking my Chantix because I wanted to sleep peacefully again, as I have previously mentioned. For the most part all of the cravings have gone away, except first thing in the morning, and i'm starting to think that that's one that may always be there.
It's Friday and it's sticky and gross and hot and there is nothing better that I can think to do but to sit on the porch with my little dog and drink a beer. There's just one problem with that...drinking a beer will make me want to light up. And if I drink a beer then Jake will have a rum and coke and then he'll want a cigarette too. Jake was way less will power than myself and I doubt that wild horses would keep him away from buying a pack of cigarettes after even just one quick visit with Captain Morgan.
In my infinite boredom and becasue I love quotes, I decided to Google quotes about alcohol, just to see what I would get...check out some of them below!
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry (...I am going to have to disagree with this one. Anyone who;s anyone when it comes to beer will more than likely agree with me when I say that the refrigerator is the greatest invention and beer is the second best. I may be Irish, but I will NEVER be able to stomach a warm Guiness!)
To some ! it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went:
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the s lowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
ALCOHOL WARNING LABELS
*The consumption may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you are tougher, smarter, faster, and/or better looking than other people.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe that people are laughing WITH you.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you can sing.
*The consumption of alcohol can, and has been know, to cause pregnancy. (Just a quick side note...Don't share this one with April or she will never drink again! LOL!!)
*The consumption of alcohol may be a major facor in dancing like a retard.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think that you can talk to members of the opposite sex without spitting.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe that you are whispering when you really are not.
It's Friday and it's sticky and gross and hot and there is nothing better that I can think to do but to sit on the porch with my little dog and drink a beer. There's just one problem with that...drinking a beer will make me want to light up. And if I drink a beer then Jake will have a rum and coke and then he'll want a cigarette too. Jake was way less will power than myself and I doubt that wild horses would keep him away from buying a pack of cigarettes after even just one quick visit with Captain Morgan.
In my infinite boredom and becasue I love quotes, I decided to Google quotes about alcohol, just to see what I would get...check out some of them below!
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry (...I am going to have to disagree with this one. Anyone who;s anyone when it comes to beer will more than likely agree with me when I say that the refrigerator is the greatest invention and beer is the second best. I may be Irish, but I will NEVER be able to stomach a warm Guiness!)
To some ! it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went:
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the s lowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
ALCOHOL WARNING LABELS
*The consumption may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you are tougher, smarter, faster, and/or better looking than other people.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe that people are laughing WITH you.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you can sing.
*The consumption of alcohol can, and has been know, to cause pregnancy. (Just a quick side note...Don't share this one with April or she will never drink again! LOL!!)
*The consumption of alcohol may be a major facor in dancing like a retard.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
*The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think that you can talk to members of the opposite sex without spitting.
*The consumption of alcohol may cause you to believe that you are whispering when you really are not.
I'm gonna tell you how I really feel!
I just got gas in both vehicles, plus a canister for the lawnmower and weed eater.
$140.00!
I stopped at $50 in the car. Went home and got the Jimmy and the small gas tank and topped at $70 in the Jimmy and it took $20 to fill our little red can.
I can safely say I assumed the position right there at BP in Auburn for everyone driving down 7th Street to see. Thank GOD Jake makes GOOD money!
$140.00!
I stopped at $50 in the car. Went home and got the Jimmy and the small gas tank and topped at $70 in the Jimmy and it took $20 to fill our little red can.
I can safely say I assumed the position right there at BP in Auburn for everyone driving down 7th Street to see. Thank GOD Jake makes GOOD money!
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Vocabulary 101
Just a quick bitch session.
I have been working on writing invoices from service calls all afternoon. I am beyond annoyed to find that 2 of our most educated techs cannot spell basic words like tried, (he spells is tryed).
The worst is the former 7th grade english teacher-turned elementary school principal-turned IT tech who spells the word "warranty" warantee.
I know everyone misspells things, but I can honestly say that 98% of my spelling errors are not spelling errors at all but rather typing errors. These are no typing errors. Anyone hear of spellchecker?
I have been working on writing invoices from service calls all afternoon. I am beyond annoyed to find that 2 of our most educated techs cannot spell basic words like tried, (he spells is tryed).
The worst is the former 7th grade english teacher-turned elementary school principal-turned IT tech who spells the word "warranty" warantee.
I know everyone misspells things, but I can honestly say that 98% of my spelling errors are not spelling errors at all but rather typing errors. These are no typing errors. Anyone hear of spellchecker?
She's goin' down, down, down
3 Arrested After Meth Lab, Baby found in Car
An infant was found in a vehicle with a mobile methamphetamine lab in the trunk Sunday during a traffic stop by police in Auburn.
According to the Auburn Police Department, officers were making a traffic stop for an illegally registered vehicle during an active drug detail Sunday when a police dog alerted officers to the presence of drugs in the vehicle.
Officers searched the vehicle and found an active clandestine methamphetamine laboratory in the trunk of the vehicle. Officers also found methamphetamine and drug paraphernalia, police said.
As a result of the search, Michelle L. Smith, Brittany M. Garrett and one man were arrested. An infant, who was also with them, was placed into the custody of the DeKalb County Department of Child Services, police said.
Smith, 28, of Auburn, is charged with felony manufacturing methamphetamine, along with maintaining a common nuisance and possession of drug paraphernalia, both misdemeanors.
Garrett, 20, of Garrett, is charged with felony neglect of a dependent and visiting a common nuisance, a misdemeanor.
The man arrested at the scene was charged with visiting a common nuisance and possession of marijuana, both misdemeanors. The Journal Gazette typically does not name those charged with misdemeanors.
A search of an Auburn home also uncovered substances used to manufacture methamphetamine. Officers are continuing to investigate and additional arrests are expected, police said.
The Auburn Police Department was assisted by the Indiana State Police Clandestine Laboratory Enforcement Team.
For those of you who don't know, Michell Smith is a former co-worker. She was troubled at the time of her employment, but she was living in a rehab home for women. After she was let go from work, I would run into her from time to time at the Meteor and Jake would always joke about how she looked like she was smoking meth. I would always defend her and say she probably had acne.
I know people tried to help her, and I know she really didn't want to be helped. I know there is nothing that I could have done to prevent her downward spiral from recreational user to owner and operator of "meth on wheels", but it still is shocking to me. I have known a few addicts, but all of them seemed pretty well worthless to me. They were just the type of people who didn't care if they were hurting themselves or others around them; They couldn't keep a job cleaning toilets in a truck stop; They beat their wives or girlfriends or children...you know the type I am referring to. This girl seemed to want to stop for her 5 year old daughter and to save her marriage and to have a decent job. I knew at the time that she was putting on a one man show, but I wanted to believe that she was going to get out of this rut she was in and straighten herself out. She had brains and she was pretty and she was talented.
Just goes to show that you never know about some people. Funny how just this morning I wrote about the trouble I am having giving up one addiction while her life is being ruined over one she can't seem to shake no matter what.
Too bad for the baby in the car. This article was the only one I could find online in the short amount of time I had to blog about this, but there are otehrs that detail the event better. The meth lab was in the trunk directly behind where the baby was sitting.
They were pulled over on a routine traffic stop by a K9 unit. Imagine that. Imagine if they would have been in an accident...even a minor one. The car would have blown up and all the people in the vehicle would have been incenerated...and it would have happend quickly with all of the chemicals involved as accelerants. (Speaking of which, how could anyone with half a brain ingest that shit knowing what goes into making it?!?) Brings new meaning to the title, which I borrowd from a Johhny Cash song.
"I fell into a burning ring of fire. I went down, down, down and the flames went higher...and it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire..."
An infant was found in a vehicle with a mobile methamphetamine lab in the trunk Sunday during a traffic stop by police in Auburn.
According to the Auburn Police Department, officers were making a traffic stop for an illegally registered vehicle during an active drug detail Sunday when a police dog alerted officers to the presence of drugs in the vehicle.
Officers searched the vehicle and found an active clandestine methamphetamine laboratory in the trunk of the vehicle. Officers also found methamphetamine and drug paraphernalia, police said.
As a result of the search, Michelle L. Smith, Brittany M. Garrett and one man were arrested. An infant, who was also with them, was placed into the custody of the DeKalb County Department of Child Services, police said.
Smith, 28, of Auburn, is charged with felony manufacturing methamphetamine, along with maintaining a common nuisance and possession of drug paraphernalia, both misdemeanors.
Garrett, 20, of Garrett, is charged with felony neglect of a dependent and visiting a common nuisance, a misdemeanor.
The man arrested at the scene was charged with visiting a common nuisance and possession of marijuana, both misdemeanors. The Journal Gazette typically does not name those charged with misdemeanors.
A search of an Auburn home also uncovered substances used to manufacture methamphetamine. Officers are continuing to investigate and additional arrests are expected, police said.
The Auburn Police Department was assisted by the Indiana State Police Clandestine Laboratory Enforcement Team.
For those of you who don't know, Michell Smith is a former co-worker. She was troubled at the time of her employment, but she was living in a rehab home for women. After she was let go from work, I would run into her from time to time at the Meteor and Jake would always joke about how she looked like she was smoking meth. I would always defend her and say she probably had acne.
I know people tried to help her, and I know she really didn't want to be helped. I know there is nothing that I could have done to prevent her downward spiral from recreational user to owner and operator of "meth on wheels", but it still is shocking to me. I have known a few addicts, but all of them seemed pretty well worthless to me. They were just the type of people who didn't care if they were hurting themselves or others around them; They couldn't keep a job cleaning toilets in a truck stop; They beat their wives or girlfriends or children...you know the type I am referring to. This girl seemed to want to stop for her 5 year old daughter and to save her marriage and to have a decent job. I knew at the time that she was putting on a one man show, but I wanted to believe that she was going to get out of this rut she was in and straighten herself out. She had brains and she was pretty and she was talented.
Just goes to show that you never know about some people. Funny how just this morning I wrote about the trouble I am having giving up one addiction while her life is being ruined over one she can't seem to shake no matter what.
Too bad for the baby in the car. This article was the only one I could find online in the short amount of time I had to blog about this, but there are otehrs that detail the event better. The meth lab was in the trunk directly behind where the baby was sitting.
They were pulled over on a routine traffic stop by a K9 unit. Imagine that. Imagine if they would have been in an accident...even a minor one. The car would have blown up and all the people in the vehicle would have been incenerated...and it would have happend quickly with all of the chemicals involved as accelerants. (Speaking of which, how could anyone with half a brain ingest that shit knowing what goes into making it?!?) Brings new meaning to the title, which I borrowd from a Johhny Cash song.
"I fell into a burning ring of fire. I went down, down, down and the flames went higher...and it burns, burns, burns, the ring of fire..."
Adventures of a Globetrotter
Or almost globetrotters.
I have been across an ocean twice, once to Spain, France, Italy, Germany, and Amsterdam on a school trip, and again to Portugal for a previous job. I have also been to Canada a handful of times and to many of the states in the Midwest and East. Jake has never even been to Canada, but he's got me topped on the number of states he's been to.
I posted last week about the trip we won to Costa Rica, which we are SO excited for!! I decided to splurge on something even more lavish and exciting. The company the trip to Costa Rica was with offers multiple trips at discounted rates for patrons who agree to sit through a half day of a high pressure sales pitch about time shares. I read and re-read and listened and re-asked question to make sure there were no hidden costs before I agreed to spend $699 on: a 4 day 3 night cruise in the Bahamas, 4 day 3 nights at both Orlando and Fort Lauderdale, 4 days 3 nights in Puerto Valletra, Mexico, and 3 days 2 nights in Las Vegas.
This is the same company that my friends Jeannie and Justin have been travelling with since before they were married. In fact, they went on the cruise for their 1 year anniversary. Neato completo, huh?
We have 18 months to book the first trip, and after that the others are negotiable to a point, and there are no black-out dates. We have not actually decided on anything, but I think we just might go on a cruise for our honeymoon! That is, if I can talk Jake into inviting his parents along too!!
I have been across an ocean twice, once to Spain, France, Italy, Germany, and Amsterdam on a school trip, and again to Portugal for a previous job. I have also been to Canada a handful of times and to many of the states in the Midwest and East. Jake has never even been to Canada, but he's got me topped on the number of states he's been to.
I posted last week about the trip we won to Costa Rica, which we are SO excited for!! I decided to splurge on something even more lavish and exciting. The company the trip to Costa Rica was with offers multiple trips at discounted rates for patrons who agree to sit through a half day of a high pressure sales pitch about time shares. I read and re-read and listened and re-asked question to make sure there were no hidden costs before I agreed to spend $699 on: a 4 day 3 night cruise in the Bahamas, 4 day 3 nights at both Orlando and Fort Lauderdale, 4 days 3 nights in Puerto Valletra, Mexico, and 3 days 2 nights in Las Vegas.
This is the same company that my friends Jeannie and Justin have been travelling with since before they were married. In fact, they went on the cruise for their 1 year anniversary. Neato completo, huh?
We have 18 months to book the first trip, and after that the others are negotiable to a point, and there are no black-out dates. We have not actually decided on anything, but I think we just might go on a cruise for our honeymoon! That is, if I can talk Jake into inviting his parents along too!!
Chantix Drems, Part 2
Well, 3 weeks on the medicine and the dreams have not stopped coming. I am happy to report however that they have gotten a lot less violent and terrifying. Now they are more like “psychological thrillers” that wake me up in the dead of night and keep me awake while I try to figure out where the hell they came from!
Last night I dreamt of Jake and I’s wedding. Only, it took place in a church that no one in either of our families had ever heard of. It was one of the strangest dreams I can remember having…EVER. You would think that in a dream about a wedding you would actually see the wedding, but I didn’t. There were no rings. Jake’s dad decided that it was time for us to get married so we did it that next weekend, and Jake was mad because he didn’t want to do it without rings. (Perhaps this was the oddest thing about the dream, Jake NEVER does anything his dad wants him to.) Mike Sassanella came to the wedding and everyone starred at him until he finally got up and walked out…(that is a whole different story!). When I woke up I laid there and wondered where it came from. Could it have been the rerun of Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations where he attended a traditional wedding in Uzbekistan? Could it have been our discussing, or rather arguing, or wedding plans at supper? The world may never know.
There was another dream in which the wife of an acquaintance gave my ring to me because Jake was too chicken to do it. All the while this is going on, Jake is following someone around his brother’s house because he thinks the guy is casing the joint or something. The guy then comes outside and starts telling us a story about his mom. That’s about all the details I can remember from that dream…and it was bizarre, even more so than the others.
I don’t usually recall dreams, so I am positive that the Chantix is causing me to have and remember these dreams. There are a handful of dreams that I recall over my lifetime, and they are all pretty scary ones. Two specific examples are my reoccurring nightmares from childhood about the box of summer clothes on the top shelf of my closet turning into a roaring and ferocious lion and about our house starting on fire. The fire one affected me pretty bad because nearly every night for weeks at a time I would wake up crying. I would always wake up at the same time too…at the point where the filing cabinet blew up, (Our family business was the farm, and my mother took care of all of the bookkeeping and accounting. I was warned countless times by everyone in the family to leave all the stuff in the filing cabinet alone because it was very important. I had a knack for playing school and carrying off papers and things.).
When I was in high school and at the peak of my Creed/Scott Stapp infatuation, I read somewhere that he tried lucid dreaming because he was having a reoccurring nightmare that he wanted to stop. Well, I bought a couple of books, and put them in the garage sale box about a chapter later! I thought it was a bunch of hooey.
Hooey or not, I have considered researching the topic yet again, just so I could get some decent sleep again. I don’t know. At least the dreams have calmed down and they are not morbid and so disturbing as they were a week ago. I guess my body has finally gotten used to the medicine.
I am happy to report that I am cigarette free now for almost 2 weeks. Jake on the other hand admitted to me last night that he has bummed a few off of some of the guys he works with, and I had to bribe him with semi-illicit sexual acts last night so he would not buy another pack, (he still has 3 days of continued smoking before he’s done cold turkey). As far as I know he didn’t buy any…but he can be sneaky. For me the trick to not “relapsing” is to just avoid smokers and situations that make me want to smoke…except waking up in the morning and eating, I have to do those and I have yet to find something to replace wanting that cigarette.
Some people have given me grief about taking a prescription to quit, (most of those people are current smokers who are not trying to quit or unsuccessfully quitting). To those people I have to say that it’s just not the same for me as it is for them. I enjoy smoking. I like cigarettes and I like smoking them. I didn’t want to quit. I have tried unsuccessfully in the past and I have tried different methods (BTW: the “quitting ally” or the person who is supposed to be supportive of you and who is supposed to be there as a sort of “rock”…don’t pick a stupid bitch to be this person because they stress you out and cause you to smoke even more!). I have said for a long time that I would quit smoking if my dad would quit. Dad is trying, (he’s not doing very well with it), but I honored my word, and I am sort of bullying Jake into quitting too.
I just keep telling myself that I need to quit in plenty of time before the wedding because I don’t want to be rushing outside 10 minutes before I am to be walking down the aisle to puff down a cigarette. Knowing my luck I would probably catch the dress on fire…
Last night I dreamt of Jake and I’s wedding. Only, it took place in a church that no one in either of our families had ever heard of. It was one of the strangest dreams I can remember having…EVER. You would think that in a dream about a wedding you would actually see the wedding, but I didn’t. There were no rings. Jake’s dad decided that it was time for us to get married so we did it that next weekend, and Jake was mad because he didn’t want to do it without rings. (Perhaps this was the oddest thing about the dream, Jake NEVER does anything his dad wants him to.) Mike Sassanella came to the wedding and everyone starred at him until he finally got up and walked out…(that is a whole different story!). When I woke up I laid there and wondered where it came from. Could it have been the rerun of Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations where he attended a traditional wedding in Uzbekistan? Could it have been our discussing, or rather arguing, or wedding plans at supper? The world may never know.
There was another dream in which the wife of an acquaintance gave my ring to me because Jake was too chicken to do it. All the while this is going on, Jake is following someone around his brother’s house because he thinks the guy is casing the joint or something. The guy then comes outside and starts telling us a story about his mom. That’s about all the details I can remember from that dream…and it was bizarre, even more so than the others.
I don’t usually recall dreams, so I am positive that the Chantix is causing me to have and remember these dreams. There are a handful of dreams that I recall over my lifetime, and they are all pretty scary ones. Two specific examples are my reoccurring nightmares from childhood about the box of summer clothes on the top shelf of my closet turning into a roaring and ferocious lion and about our house starting on fire. The fire one affected me pretty bad because nearly every night for weeks at a time I would wake up crying. I would always wake up at the same time too…at the point where the filing cabinet blew up, (Our family business was the farm, and my mother took care of all of the bookkeeping and accounting. I was warned countless times by everyone in the family to leave all the stuff in the filing cabinet alone because it was very important. I had a knack for playing school and carrying off papers and things.).
When I was in high school and at the peak of my Creed/Scott Stapp infatuation, I read somewhere that he tried lucid dreaming because he was having a reoccurring nightmare that he wanted to stop. Well, I bought a couple of books, and put them in the garage sale box about a chapter later! I thought it was a bunch of hooey.
Hooey or not, I have considered researching the topic yet again, just so I could get some decent sleep again. I don’t know. At least the dreams have calmed down and they are not morbid and so disturbing as they were a week ago. I guess my body has finally gotten used to the medicine.
I am happy to report that I am cigarette free now for almost 2 weeks. Jake on the other hand admitted to me last night that he has bummed a few off of some of the guys he works with, and I had to bribe him with semi-illicit sexual acts last night so he would not buy another pack, (he still has 3 days of continued smoking before he’s done cold turkey). As far as I know he didn’t buy any…but he can be sneaky. For me the trick to not “relapsing” is to just avoid smokers and situations that make me want to smoke…except waking up in the morning and eating, I have to do those and I have yet to find something to replace wanting that cigarette.
Some people have given me grief about taking a prescription to quit, (most of those people are current smokers who are not trying to quit or unsuccessfully quitting). To those people I have to say that it’s just not the same for me as it is for them. I enjoy smoking. I like cigarettes and I like smoking them. I didn’t want to quit. I have tried unsuccessfully in the past and I have tried different methods (BTW: the “quitting ally” or the person who is supposed to be supportive of you and who is supposed to be there as a sort of “rock”…don’t pick a stupid bitch to be this person because they stress you out and cause you to smoke even more!). I have said for a long time that I would quit smoking if my dad would quit. Dad is trying, (he’s not doing very well with it), but I honored my word, and I am sort of bullying Jake into quitting too.
I just keep telling myself that I need to quit in plenty of time before the wedding because I don’t want to be rushing outside 10 minutes before I am to be walking down the aisle to puff down a cigarette. Knowing my luck I would probably catch the dress on fire…
Monday, June 2, 2008
Silly Goose and Cackling Hens
There is a woman I work with, Linda, who is the silliest person I know. There really are no accurate words to describe her. Loud, dingy, goofy, space-cadet...these are just the first few that come to mind. She walks up to the inventory desk this morning and this is part of the conversation I heard:
Linda (in red): Oh, crap, I forgot my pen.
Teresa (in blue): Here, use mine.
Oh, this pen writes really nice! Where did you get it?
I know, it's my favorite. My son got it from an Army recruiter when they were at his school and I took it from him.
How much ink is left?
(With a look of total confusion) Huh?
I mean, how long have you had it?
I don't know, a couple of weeks.
So there is still plenty of ink left in it?
I guess.
Can I have it?
Teresa of course was not going to give up the pen! Everyone that sits in that part of the office by this time had poked our heads out of our cubbies and was starring open-mouthed at the two of them. When Linda left the room we all looked at one another and laughed out loud. Who asks if they can have a pen when the person the pen belongs to just told you it's their favorite? I think it's common knowledge that if you loan someone a pen and they like it, there's a good chance they will steal it. My mom is a perfect example of this. Her purse is weighted down by pens that has has taken from work, schools, doctors and dentists offices, and anywhere else they seem to be just laying around. (I in turn take them from her to fill my own purse!)
I don't know why it struck me a funny that she asked if she could have it. I am glad that others laughed too. Maybe it was just because of who it was and her goofy and off beat personality, but it just made my Monday morning!
Linda (in red): Oh, crap, I forgot my pen.
Teresa (in blue): Here, use mine.
Oh, this pen writes really nice! Where did you get it?
I know, it's my favorite. My son got it from an Army recruiter when they were at his school and I took it from him.
How much ink is left?
(With a look of total confusion) Huh?
I mean, how long have you had it?
I don't know, a couple of weeks.
So there is still plenty of ink left in it?
I guess.
Can I have it?
Teresa of course was not going to give up the pen! Everyone that sits in that part of the office by this time had poked our heads out of our cubbies and was starring open-mouthed at the two of them. When Linda left the room we all looked at one another and laughed out loud. Who asks if they can have a pen when the person the pen belongs to just told you it's their favorite? I think it's common knowledge that if you loan someone a pen and they like it, there's a good chance they will steal it. My mom is a perfect example of this. Her purse is weighted down by pens that has has taken from work, schools, doctors and dentists offices, and anywhere else they seem to be just laying around. (I in turn take them from her to fill my own purse!)
I don't know why it struck me a funny that she asked if she could have it. I am glad that others laughed too. Maybe it was just because of who it was and her goofy and off beat personality, but it just made my Monday morning!
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